Sikh Wife Could Be Jailed For Sex After Arranged Marriage With Learning Disabled Husband
This is an awful case. Sadly it is not the only one of its kind within the South Asian community.
I find it absolutely terrible that the husband was forced into the marriage when he ‘has never understood what marriage means’ and does not have the capacity to understand marriage.
While the man’s parents probably wanted to get him “married off” to someone who could care for him after their lifetimes, it has not been revealed why the wife’s parents wanted/agreed to get her married to a man with such serious learning disabilities.
Sadly although people within the South Asian community appear to be willing to accept the forced marriage of learning disabled people, they are far less willing to accept the idea of physically disabled people marrying their children- or any siblings a physically disabled child may have.
It seems to me that the woman did not consent to the marriage for the right reasons either. She clearly wants to stay married to her husband, but only to keep up appearances within the community.
What has also not been revealed is whether the man has any understanding of sex. If he has even a basic understanding, could sex not be explained to him at his level of understanding before it is banned from his life? Since he has a female partner, he would also need to have it explained that sex can sometimes lead to pregnancy.
If there is no possibility of this- and since the wife’s father has now sadly passed away- is there no one who could support her in coming out of the marriage and rebuilding her life, so that she can later meet a husband of her own choice and possibly have some children?
My heart goes out to both of them. It is one of those cases where I really, really wish I could help in some way, but I know that nothing can be done.
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Most likely, the reason they agreed to it was because of the learning disabled man’s status in the SIkh community, and perhaps because they thought it was a free ticket to the UK for the girl. I read the judgement and it said that the man (who lives in a care home) did not even display any evidence of having sexual desires at all.
I find it ironic that some SIkhs talk about how progressive their religion is, how it came to do away with caste-ism and make women equal with men, but the fact is that izzat is rife and that is how cases like this happen.
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Also the reason she wants to stay with him is more than just “keeping up appearances”; it’s because if she were to leave him, she would be deported, and then would fall out of favour with her family and likely never be able to marry again. So it’s essentially a marriage of convenience but vital for her well-being now that it’s happened.
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Thank you Matthew for clarifying that its very useful.
Now I just want to GET THE POOR WOMAN OUT OF THE MARRIAGE. And those PARENTS. Trying to get their son married when he has no SEXUAL DESIRES! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Readers I realise I’ve broken my own comments policy by typing in capitals but please forgive me and take this as what it is- a sign of deep frustration!
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