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Pudsey Bear’s WCA

November 16, 2012

As a celebration of Children In Need, I gave Pudsey Bear a WCA.

Pudsey Bear’s WCA

Here’s what happened when Pudsey, the disabled bear, went for a Work Capability Assessment to the offices of ATOS.

ATOS Worker: Hello, please sit down.

(Pudsey sits, looking confused)

ATOS Worker: So, he can sit independently. How are you today?

Pudsey: Good, thank you.

ATOS Worker: Hold your arms out, turn your hands over. Straighten your fingers.

Pudsey: I don’t have hands, or fingers.

ATOS Worker: Hmmm…  stand up on your tiptoes.

Pudsey: I don’t have toes… or feet.

ATOS Worker: Hmm… please remove that horrible scarf from across your face. Open your right eye.

Pudsey: It’s not a scarf, it’s an eye patch. And I don’t have a right eye. One of the children pulled it off. That’s why I had to stop working. I’m partially sighted.

ATOS Worker: Children? You have children? You’re not disabled! Disabled people can’t have CHILDREN!

Pudsey: They’re not my children… I’m a charity mascot… they’re the children I help.

ATOS Worker: A charity mascot? So, you already have a job.  Disability benefit fraud… well well well.

Pudsey: But I’m a partially sighted teddy bear with no fingers, hands, toes or feet…

ATOS Worker: Well, Mr Pudsey, if you’re fit to be in the same room as children, you’re fit to work. Close the door on your way out. NEXT!   

 

What are you thinking?