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Refused ESA For Putting A Crumpet In The Toaster, And Other Stories Of DWP Nonsense

November 3, 2016

Last week, highly respected blog Vox Political asked its readers to send in the nonsense reasons their disability benefit claims were turned down. Here are some of them, reprinted with many thanks in the interest of sharing DWP madness as widely as possible. They are all anonymous.

All of the comments that follow are true, and were made by real people. I have anonymised them for obvious reasons.

Let’s start with a person who was denied a home assessment. The reason? “He can get to hospital for cancer treatment.” Have a little think about that. Where else but hospital was this person ever going to get cancer treatment? And shouldn’t cancer automatically qualify him for benefit? Apparently not.

Try this: “Can heat up a tin of beans and make toast” The person concerned had explained that if they actually ate beans on toast they would be hospitalised.

“Can sit in the gutter to rest between short bouts of walking.” According to some assessors it is perfectly permissible to force the sick and disabled into the gutter. That’s where the removal of benefits will put them, in any case.

Another claimant was denied benefit because they were able to propel themselves in a wheelchair. The problem? This person does not have a wheelchair.

“Can watch TV for an hour – 0 points.”

“Able to have a bath unaided – 0 points.”

“Tying shoelaces – 0 points.”

(Bear in mind, folks, that these are comments in work capability assessments, and ask yourself: How is watching TV a usable work skill? How does having a bath or tying shoelaces make a person a more attractive employment opportunity?)

“Was able to answer questions without help from another person.”

Of someone with fibromyalgia: “Moved well for someone with arthritis.” Fibromyalgia is not arthritis.

“Despite us explaining that travelling was often difficult as [this person’s partner’s] seizures cause blackouts, amnesia and confusion they completely ignored this and said he had no problem reading signs and getting to places (untrue). They were also … seemingly oblivious to the fact that “non-epileptic” seizures is a medical term, they therefore dismissed them as not serious.”

“I had the ‘Brought a bag, opened a door’ nonsense. Plus it said I was ‘Neat, presentable and well kempt’ when at that point, I actually hadn’t been able to wash or shave my beard for about two months. And my beard is full on Albert Steptoe, not a trendy lumberjack type!”

“When asked if I went to the shops I said yes, once or twice a month as I have to buy food. That got turned into ‘goes shopping every day and uses public transport every day’. When I replied by letter saying I don’t do these things every day the response I got was ‘maybe not, but you can’. So the need to buy food makes a person ineligible for benefit. Doesn’t that mean benefit should only be paid to dead people?

This one is beyond belief: “Shortly after my father died of a massive brain haemorrhage and whilst my brother was in hospital on a life support machine after a brain haemorrhage): ‘enjoys an active social life visiting … brother in hospital on a regular basis.’ Between those two events I had been diagnosed with a rare and incurable and untreatable disease I knew little about and hadn’t even been assessed by NHS at that point. ‘Has no mental health problems’ – I was clinging on by my finger tips. Incidentally, this assessment was carried out by a consultant psychiatrist with no knowledge of my condition and who promoted Atos by praising the 9-5 hours which allowed him to work on his real passion – making furniture.”

“Refused ESA because I could put a crumpet in the toaster for my daughter.”

“Having a backpack.”

“No problem putting on a coat (that I wasn’t wearing … as it was summer).”

“Can walk around Tesco. This is after I told her I cannot walk around the whole supermarket and that I had recently left my shopping half way through.”

“I got upset.”

“I scratched the back of my head. [They] said I carried two bags of shopping into assessment which was a total lie.”

“My assessor told the DWP that I had never worked and didn’t want to work after discussing with him 20 years in catering and the fact I’d worked since I was 15 and had to give up work due to illness.”

“The DWP … told the tribunal that I hadn’t filled in the application or sent in any medical records. I had sent 20 years worth, registered mail, signed for and had an email confirming they’d received them. The tribunal asked what I had to say to that. I responded ‘How did I get to a tribunal for something I didn’t apply for and how did they receive an assessment from a medical I didn’t attend?’ Then handed them copies/proof of everything I’d said. I was awarded my benefits.”

“At a tribunal they found me fit for work because I could operate my washing machine. I’ve had it for years. All it takes is three buttons – on, cottons, start.”

Here’s a classic that is still being used: “Does not suffer anxiety as they do not rock back and forth in a chair.”

“Claimant stated chronic back pain but on observation was observed to be fit and well. (I have a VISIBLE scoliosis).”

“Claimant stated … suffers from Agrophobia but attended assessment (because they REFUSED a home visit & threatened to cut off my PIP for non attendance).”

“Claimant claims she needs support if forced to go outside but was observed alone for her assessment (my support Worker attended with me).”

“At my tribunal I was denied ESA because, and these are quotes from the DOCTOR, ‘You seem to be able to put your hair in a pony tail, your nails are painted, you have eye make-up on, surely if you suffer from severe morning fatigue you’ll be fine to work afternoons’. I suffer from chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, and illness induced anxiety. And this was 2015! It’s quite unbelievable how rude, unprofessional and belittling these people are. I cried for days afterwards.”

“Was told I ‘showed understanding of my condition’ as evidence that I was lying.”

“My most recent assessment was six weeks ago and the report is filled with so many lies it’s unreal as well as comments such as ‘Carried a sheet of paper in her hand’, ‘Drank water from a disposable plastic cup’. All my money has been stopped because of what this assessor has put in the report, just before Christmas too. Cheers DWP.”

Same Difference has used our personal favourite (smell our sarcasm) as the headline for this article. Vox Political hopes to publish more similar stories tomorrow.

8 Comments leave one →
  1. November 3, 2016 3:21 pm

    People need to demand the HP, DECISION MAKER and anyone they asked about the report attend the tribunal hearing then ask them loads of questions about the report the people they asked for help their field of expertise if they turned up also and get the report thrown out if they haven’t. If they won’t throw it out then go to work on the medical person on the panel make them regret even getting out of bed. There are many questions that can be put to the person about both the DM and HP that they could only speculate on the answers of. Finish off with asking them to point out fact and opinion in the report, unless they have thrown it out in which case you won’t need to ask the questions because they may find in your favour if they throw the HP’s report out

  2. November 3, 2016 4:22 pm

    Reblogged this on Poppy's Place.

  3. November 3, 2016 4:30 pm

    Reblogged this on jacobusmcmxlvii.

  4. November 3, 2016 4:32 pm

    Reblogged this on sdbast.

  5. November 3, 2016 8:02 pm

    Reblogged this on campertess.

  6. November 6, 2016 7:39 pm

    first thing stated on my assessment was I could carry a full kettle which I did NOT say …..after that the lies just proceeded to come ….luckily the real doctor at the tribunal realised and upheld my appeal 🙂

  7. Albert Piscene permalink
    November 10, 2016 8:57 pm

    I went for an assessment in October, after which I received a ‘phone call where I indicated that my mental health had deteriorated after the assessment (I wasn’t told that I was too unfit to work, and I started cutting and drinking half a bottle of vodka in one sitting, so I was put into the employment group, where I had a meltdown in the dole office). Stupidly I asked for a mandatory reconsideration, after which someone with little knowledge of the English language decided that I was not eligible for ESA, so I looked at what he said, and because I said that I had had a pint with a friend (who I hadn’t seen for two years before then) claimed that I regularly have a pint with friends. I was told that I have borderline personality disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder and possible aspergers, but I am still able to work apparently, even though I finished my last job when I was told by their doctor that I was permanently unfit for work. There are other lies, ommisions and misunderstandings, but I won’t go into them all here.


  1. Refused ESA For Putting A Crumpet In The Toaster, And Other Stories Of DWP Nonsense — Same Difference | L8in

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